Thursday, September 23, 2004
Good story of the day:
Today I climbed into the Uni kitchen through the window. And then back out again. Sue got mad at me, but I promised never ever to do it again. Alas.
Also, I am wishing hard for a Jewfro.
Today I climbed into the Uni kitchen through the window. And then back out again. Sue got mad at me, but I promised never ever to do it again. Alas.
Also, I am wishing hard for a Jewfro.
Monday, July 19, 2004
Sorry its been so long (over a month, eep!) But I just wanted to say good lord I love Death Cab for Cutie.
The glove compartment is inaccuratly named
and everybody knows it
So I'm proposing a swift orderly change
Because behind its door there's nothing to keep my fingers warm
And all I find are souvenirs from better times before the gleam of your
taillights fading east to find yourself a better life
I was searching for some legal document as the rain beat down on the hood
When I stumbled upon pictures I'd tried to forget
And that's how this idea was drilled into my head
Cause it's too important to stay the way its been
But there's no blame for how our love did slowly fade
And now that its gone, its like it wasnt there at all
And here I rest: where disappointment and regret collide,
lying awake at night
***
Sometimes I think this cycle never ends
We slide from top to bottom then we turn and climb again
And it seems by the time that I have figured what it's worth
The squeaking of our skin against the steel has gotten worse
But if I move my place in line I'll lose
And I have waited, the anticipation's got me glued
I am waiting for something to go wrong
I am waiting for familiar resolve
Sometimes it seems that I don't have the skills to recollect
The twists and turns of plot that turned us from lovers to friends
I'm thinking I should take that volume back up off the shelf
And crack its weary spine and read to help remind myself
But if I move my place in line I'll lose
And I have waited, the anticipation's got me glued
I am waiting for something to go wrong
I am waiting for familiar resolve
I am waiting for another repeat
Andother diet fed by crippling defeat
And I am waiting for that sense of relief
I am waiting for you to flee this scene
As if you held in your hand a smoking gun
Andon the floor laid the one you said you loved
And what's strange is they're all baisically the same
So I don't ask names anymore
***
I've got a hunger twisting my stomach into knots
that my tongue has tied off
My brain's repeating, If you've got an impulse, LET IT OUT!
But they never make it past my mouth
This the sound of settling
Our youth is fleeting, old age is just around the bend and I can't wait to go gray
And I'll sit and wonderof every love that could have been
If I'd only thought of something charming to say
This is the sound of settling
***
This is the moment that you know
That you told her that you loved her but you don't
You touch her skin and then you think
That she is beautiful but she don't mean a thing to me
I spent two weeks in Silverlake
The California sun cascading down my face
There was a girl with light brown streaks
And she was beautiful, but she didn't mean a thing to me
I wanted to believe in all the words that I was speaking
as we moved togeather in the dark
And all the friends that I was telling, all the playful misspellings
and every bite I made that left a mark
As tiny vessels oozed into your neck and formed the bruises
that you said you didn't want to fade
But they did and so did I that day
All I see are dark gray clouds
In the distance moving closer every hour
So when you'd ask, Is something wrong?
I'd think, You're damn right there is, but we can't talk about it now
No, we can't talk about it now
So one last touch and then you'll go
And we'll pretend that it meant something so much more
But it was vile and it was cheap
And you are beautiful, but you don't mean a thing to me
***
The Atlantic was born today and I'll tell you how
The clouds above opened up and let it out
I was standing on the surface of a perforated sphere
when the water filled every hole
And thousands upon thousands made an ocean making islands
where no islands should go
Most people were overjoyed; they took to their boats
I thought it less like a lake and more like a moat
The rhythms of my footsteps crossing flatlands to your door
have been silenced forevermore
And the distance is quite simply too far for me to row
it seems farther than ever before
I need you so much closer
***
I roll the window down and then begin to breathe in
the darkest country road and the strong scent of evergreen
from the passenger seat as you are driving me home
Then looking upwards I strain my eyes and try
to tell the difference between shooting stars and satellites
from the passenger seat as you are driving me home
Do they collide? I ask and you smile
Whith my feet on the dash the world doesn't matter
When you feel embarrassed, then I'll be your pride
When you need directions, then I'll be the guide
for all time
***
God bless the daylight, the sugary smell of springtime
Remembering when you were mine in a still suburban town
When every Thursday I'd brave those mountain passes
and you'd skip your early classes
And we'd learn how our bodies worked
God damn the black night with all its foul temptations
I've become what I always hated when I was with you then
We looked like giants in the back of my gray subcompact
Fumbling to make contact as the others slept inside
And tofeather there in a shroud of frost, the mountain air began to
pass through every pane of weathered glass and I held you closer
than anyone would ever get
Do you remember the J.A.M.C. and reading aloud from magazines?
I don't know about you, but I swear on my name
they could smell it on me
And I've never been too good with secrets
***
And when I see you, I really see you upside down
But my brain knows better, it picks you up and turns you around
If you feel discouraged when there's a lack of color here
Please don't worry lover, its really bursting at the seams
from absorbing everything
The spectrum's A-to-Z
This is fact not fiction for the first time in years
And all the girls in every girlie magazine can't make me feel
any less alone
I'm reaching for the phone
To call at 7:03 and on you machine I slur a plea
for you to come home
But I know its too late, and I should have given you a reason
to stay
The glove compartment is inaccuratly named
and everybody knows it
So I'm proposing a swift orderly change
Because behind its door there's nothing to keep my fingers warm
And all I find are souvenirs from better times before the gleam of your
taillights fading east to find yourself a better life
I was searching for some legal document as the rain beat down on the hood
When I stumbled upon pictures I'd tried to forget
And that's how this idea was drilled into my head
Cause it's too important to stay the way its been
But there's no blame for how our love did slowly fade
And now that its gone, its like it wasnt there at all
And here I rest: where disappointment and regret collide,
lying awake at night
***
Sometimes I think this cycle never ends
We slide from top to bottom then we turn and climb again
And it seems by the time that I have figured what it's worth
The squeaking of our skin against the steel has gotten worse
But if I move my place in line I'll lose
And I have waited, the anticipation's got me glued
I am waiting for something to go wrong
I am waiting for familiar resolve
Sometimes it seems that I don't have the skills to recollect
The twists and turns of plot that turned us from lovers to friends
I'm thinking I should take that volume back up off the shelf
And crack its weary spine and read to help remind myself
But if I move my place in line I'll lose
And I have waited, the anticipation's got me glued
I am waiting for something to go wrong
I am waiting for familiar resolve
I am waiting for another repeat
Andother diet fed by crippling defeat
And I am waiting for that sense of relief
I am waiting for you to flee this scene
As if you held in your hand a smoking gun
Andon the floor laid the one you said you loved
And what's strange is they're all baisically the same
So I don't ask names anymore
***
I've got a hunger twisting my stomach into knots
that my tongue has tied off
My brain's repeating, If you've got an impulse, LET IT OUT!
But they never make it past my mouth
This the sound of settling
Our youth is fleeting, old age is just around the bend and I can't wait to go gray
And I'll sit and wonderof every love that could have been
If I'd only thought of something charming to say
This is the sound of settling
***
This is the moment that you know
That you told her that you loved her but you don't
You touch her skin and then you think
That she is beautiful but she don't mean a thing to me
I spent two weeks in Silverlake
The California sun cascading down my face
There was a girl with light brown streaks
And she was beautiful, but she didn't mean a thing to me
I wanted to believe in all the words that I was speaking
as we moved togeather in the dark
And all the friends that I was telling, all the playful misspellings
and every bite I made that left a mark
As tiny vessels oozed into your neck and formed the bruises
that you said you didn't want to fade
But they did and so did I that day
All I see are dark gray clouds
In the distance moving closer every hour
So when you'd ask, Is something wrong?
I'd think, You're damn right there is, but we can't talk about it now
No, we can't talk about it now
So one last touch and then you'll go
And we'll pretend that it meant something so much more
But it was vile and it was cheap
And you are beautiful, but you don't mean a thing to me
***
The Atlantic was born today and I'll tell you how
The clouds above opened up and let it out
I was standing on the surface of a perforated sphere
when the water filled every hole
And thousands upon thousands made an ocean making islands
where no islands should go
Most people were overjoyed; they took to their boats
I thought it less like a lake and more like a moat
The rhythms of my footsteps crossing flatlands to your door
have been silenced forevermore
And the distance is quite simply too far for me to row
it seems farther than ever before
I need you so much closer
***
I roll the window down and then begin to breathe in
the darkest country road and the strong scent of evergreen
from the passenger seat as you are driving me home
Then looking upwards I strain my eyes and try
to tell the difference between shooting stars and satellites
from the passenger seat as you are driving me home
Do they collide? I ask and you smile
Whith my feet on the dash the world doesn't matter
When you feel embarrassed, then I'll be your pride
When you need directions, then I'll be the guide
for all time
***
God bless the daylight, the sugary smell of springtime
Remembering when you were mine in a still suburban town
When every Thursday I'd brave those mountain passes
and you'd skip your early classes
And we'd learn how our bodies worked
God damn the black night with all its foul temptations
I've become what I always hated when I was with you then
We looked like giants in the back of my gray subcompact
Fumbling to make contact as the others slept inside
And tofeather there in a shroud of frost, the mountain air began to
pass through every pane of weathered glass and I held you closer
than anyone would ever get
Do you remember the J.A.M.C. and reading aloud from magazines?
I don't know about you, but I swear on my name
they could smell it on me
And I've never been too good with secrets
***
And when I see you, I really see you upside down
But my brain knows better, it picks you up and turns you around
If you feel discouraged when there's a lack of color here
Please don't worry lover, its really bursting at the seams
from absorbing everything
The spectrum's A-to-Z
This is fact not fiction for the first time in years
And all the girls in every girlie magazine can't make me feel
any less alone
I'm reaching for the phone
To call at 7:03 and on you machine I slur a plea
for you to come home
But I know its too late, and I should have given you a reason
to stay
Friday, June 04, 2004
This morning I finished all my driving hours, so now I can get my drivers license in a month. Woohoo! Then I went to see Harry Potter 3. Good times. I was worried that they'd do Sirius badly or that they would leave my favorite part out, but no. All was good. And I enjoyed it greatly.
Then off to home and ha HA! Then I went and spent the evening with Annie. Ah, so much fun. I came home kind of giddy cause I'd been laughing so hard the whole evening and I whacked my finger on the door on my way into my room. The fingernail bent back, farther than its meant to go. Back far enough that it ripped the fingernail up. I could peel off the nail and see the never-before-seen skin. But I wont. Its painful.
Now to bed, and hopefully a run in the morning. We'll see though. My alarm clock is dead. For real this time.
Then off to home and ha HA! Then I went and spent the evening with Annie. Ah, so much fun. I came home kind of giddy cause I'd been laughing so hard the whole evening and I whacked my finger on the door on my way into my room. The fingernail bent back, farther than its meant to go. Back far enough that it ripped the fingernail up. I could peel off the nail and see the never-before-seen skin. But I wont. Its painful.
Now to bed, and hopefully a run in the morning. We'll see though. My alarm clock is dead. For real this time.
Tuesday, May 25, 2004
Well, one down, three to go. Then I'm a senior! At last...
I'm going to miss having Sensei. I'm going to miss having her class... She is such a sweet person, and I think that she cares about her students more than any other of the teachers at Uni. The other day in class she called us her sons and daughters. Aww, thanks Sensei.
I am feeling better. Alot, actually. I had a good day, alot of relaxing but still fairly productive. I'm not even all that stressed out about my final, although at some point I probably will be. I spent all day working on math, but I spent most of the time preparing to study, not actually studying. Bad me. Ah well. I'm not sure this final will have a large impact on my grade anyway. Unless I get an F or an A+. Anything in between won't really do anything for my grade. An I dont think theres much of a chance of getting either of those. So whatever. I have totally finished the school year in my mind, even though I still have three tests. And I'm actually starting to look forward to the summer too...
I'm going to miss having Sensei. I'm going to miss having her class... She is such a sweet person, and I think that she cares about her students more than any other of the teachers at Uni. The other day in class she called us her sons and daughters. Aww, thanks Sensei.
I am feeling better. Alot, actually. I had a good day, alot of relaxing but still fairly productive. I'm not even all that stressed out about my final, although at some point I probably will be. I spent all day working on math, but I spent most of the time preparing to study, not actually studying. Bad me. Ah well. I'm not sure this final will have a large impact on my grade anyway. Unless I get an F or an A+. Anything in between won't really do anything for my grade. An I dont think theres much of a chance of getting either of those. So whatever. I have totally finished the school year in my mind, even though I still have three tests. And I'm actually starting to look forward to the summer too...
Monday, May 24, 2004
I am so tired and frustrated and mad at everyone. And I don't know why. I am not looking forward to anything in the near future. I guess there are things I could look forward to, but I know that none of it will turn out the way I hope it will. Just like nothing recently has turned out the way I wanted it to.
Sunday, May 23, 2004
Its almost the end of the year, the end of what has turned out to be a really strange year for me. Oh, if only I could go back in time to August and tell myself about it. It'd be pretty good.
The dC sleeps alone tonight... hahaha. You know what I'm talking about.
On the list: Fatboy Slim and The Shins. They have distracted me all day. And I need more. I have decided.
Prom was really nice. I actually enjoyed the dance alot more than I thought I would, which is nice. I suppose I wasn't there long enough to get tired of it. What was that song? That one... the prayer 80's one. I dont remember. But I knew the words.
I want to read In the Night Kitchen. I don't have a propeller plane. But for a while last night it was close enough.
I like being home alone. Its like playing house.
The dC sleeps alone tonight... hahaha. You know what I'm talking about.
On the list: Fatboy Slim and The Shins. They have distracted me all day. And I need more. I have decided.
Prom was really nice. I actually enjoyed the dance alot more than I thought I would, which is nice. I suppose I wasn't there long enough to get tired of it. What was that song? That one... the prayer 80's one. I dont remember. But I knew the words.
I want to read In the Night Kitchen. I don't have a propeller plane. But for a while last night it was close enough.
I like being home alone. Its like playing house.
Saturday, May 22, 2004
Oh, you have no idea. Ready, normal people?
Indeed. Overall good, and although it was a slow moving day, it was once which I was only in some ways eager to reach the end of. It was the seniors last day, but not mine. Not even my last day of the year. I'm going to miss them. I think I'll be a little lonely next year.
Then onwards to fun, Requiem for a Dream, and then a walk in the park with Gracie and Chaver. They are in love. Puppy love. If only we had discovered this sooner, we could have gotten them togeather to play more often. Ah well, there's still the summer.
Indeed. Overall good, and although it was a slow moving day, it was once which I was only in some ways eager to reach the end of. It was the seniors last day, but not mine. Not even my last day of the year. I'm going to miss them. I think I'll be a little lonely next year.
Then onwards to fun, Requiem for a Dream, and then a walk in the park with Gracie and Chaver. They are in love. Puppy love. If only we had discovered this sooner, we could have gotten them togeather to play more often. Ah well, there's still the summer.
